I came up with these in a flurry while listening to The Strokes’ “Ize of the World,” a song off their newest album, First Impressions of Earth. It’s a sort-of clever play on words on the “eyes of the world,” obviously. I didn’t need to say that. Anyway, the choruses are comprised of culturally-relevant current statements that end in “-ize” (I cheated and used “-ise” too). And the song has a trick ending, which I duplicated here. You won’t get any of this if you haven’t heard the song. Not that there’s anything to get; this is pointless.
Chihuahuas to accessorize
Classic films to bastardize
Moviegoers to galvanize
MP3 libraries to organize
0% APR to advertise
Curling to televise
Muslims to proselytize
Royal Sauds to fraternize
Closeted gays to catholicize
501(c)(3)s to monetize
Selves to aggrandize
Rubber to vulcanize
Penises to desensiti–
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