May 30, 2017 at 3:05PM

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Can you do a critical review of this short film?

With a cast who saw the industrial screenplay format for the first time and a crew who asked me what I meant by "pan shot" , I finally managed to create my first short film "Stifle". But there were a lot of screw ups and the end result didn't reach its full potential . So a critical review of the short will be much appreciated.
https://youtu.be/L262nAzDsI0

4 Comments

Well, first of all, I have to say, if I see another film with a Double killing himself, I will go nuts. And I even wrote TWO myself before realizing it's just about the most boring twist someone can come up with.
Having said that...
It's not terrible, it's just... nothing. You don't give us any reward at the end. Isn't it important to the Man in the Mask that the other guy understands WHY he's about to die? What's the point of keeping him alive otherwise? Why can't the man in the mask show his face? What's with the "F" on the desk? Why would he wipe any of the gun off, but not the whole thing? Then why leave it there? Do you know how much forensic evidence he left behind? Why does he let out that little wisp of smoke? Why the blood, which, by the way, he doesn't cough up, he just puts his hand over his mouth, and suddenly blood. And who shot him? Didn't he just kill the guy, who was tied up?

These are not the kinds of questions you want to leave your audience with. Makes things unbelievable.

June 11, 2017 at 9:18PM

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Edmund Lloyd
Cinematographer/Director
328

Thanks for the review. I dont know if you noticed that the masked man and the boy are the same person (which is pretty obvious if watched closely) .
It's meant to be like a dream sequence.I guess I failed to clarify that its a dream sequence and got my audience confused and asking the wrong questions .
Any way thanks for the review again.

June 22, 2017 at 3:06PM, Edited June 22, 3:09PM

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Tahmid Rumi
Writer , Director , Video Editor
105

I totally agree with Edmund.

If you are making a film like this, a film like this should force you to stick with it and don't lose the interest at any point.
But I think that's how we learn. So keep doing it until you get it perfect.

June 22, 2017 at 4:50AM

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Dilip Suthar
Editor and Cinematographer
208

Thanks for the feedback .Much appreciated .

June 22, 2017 at 3:07PM

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Tahmid Rumi
Writer , Director , Video Editor
105

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