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We All Start Somewhere: Watch the Directorial Debut That Haunts Academy Award Winner Ben Affleck

02.17.13 @ 11:59PM Tags : , , , ,

The first films you make are never going to be your best (unless things go really, really well, and you’ve got a bit of money behind you). Just because a movie may be someone’s first feature, doesn’t mean they’ve never made a film before. Sometimes there are a few gems in that early work, but more often than not, plenty of them are cringe-worthy. That seems to be the case with one of Academy Award-winning Ben Affleck’s first short films made in 1993, I Killed My Lesbian Wife, Hung Her on a Meat Hook, and Now I Have a Three-Picture Deal at Disney (catch all that?). Watch the film embedded below.

Apparently this is the film Affleck was talking about in an interview with Entertainment Weekly (thanks to Film School Rejects for the links):

“It’s horrible,” he told Entertainment Weekly a few years ago. “It’s atrocious. I knew I wanted to be a director, and I did a couple of short films, and this is the only one that haunts me. I’m not proud of it…It looks like it was made by someone who has no prospects, no promise.”

The movie is separated into two parts (and there is quite a bit of NSFW language):

He’s certainly gone on to bigger and better things, but if you’re ever feeling discouraged about your work, just know that Affleck directed the film above and is now nominated for a Director’s Guild of America award and Best Picture Academy Award this year for Argo. It’s one of the reasons why discouraging others about their work is a complete waste of time: we’ve all got something we’re not proud of — and that includes those working at the highest level.

So the next time you’re thinking about leaving a comment on someone’s film that is anything but constructive, consider that they might be standing on the Academy stage one day, while you’re sitting at home watching it on television.


[via Film School Rejects]


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  • Ben Affleck isn’t nominated for an Academy Award for Best Director.

  • Ben Affleck is not nominated for a Best Director Oscar. Argo is up for Best Picture and Adapted Screenplay, though.

  • Well it aint that bad, it least has real actors in it. I am not saying it is good. But we might wonna change this thread into something like; if he did this then it was much better. So we all can learn from his mistakes.


  • I quite enjoyed this. It seemed to have a hint of Lynch in it. I’m curious if he is/was a fan.

  • Affleck is a fine director and a humble one too. It’s funny that he talks on and on about how talented everyone is but he’s one of the best genre directors in Hollywood right now, kind of a sucessor to Eastwood (who started out by making his own Dirty Harry movies and soon after made the incredible “White Hunter, Black Heart”). I can see him making some classics in his old age, he has so many movies left in him.

  • I’m with Josh, I quite like it :-)

  • He was 21 back then, in an era where we didn’t have DSLR’s nor NLE’s at home.
    He more than made up for this one by doing Good Will Hunting.

  • vinceGortho on 02.18.13 @ 11:17AM

    Has anyone seen Tarantino’s My Best Friends Birthday on youtube?

  • Well its better than a lot of stuff currently out there, and this is from a time where you had very limited resources. Still, its nice to appreciate his improvement.

  • John Waters on 02.18.13 @ 1:38PM

    I think a great feature for nofilmschool to run would be 10 or so film makers comparing their first work against something more recent and a bit of a spiel on that progression, could be nice!

  • Yikes. That was terrible. I couldn’t even get through part 1. That said, my first film is just as bad! We all have to start somewhere and you learn the most by directing as much as possible. I for one am so happy Ben Affleck managed to pick himself up and get re-focused after the almost career-ending errors of “Daredevil”, “Pearl Harbor” and the whole “Bennifer” mess.

  • I don’t have patience to watch it, but the title is awesome.

  • Interesting short… i’m kinda surprised/impressed. There’s no music in it, yet wasn’t boring IMO (per se. lol). Now, if being a first film, does one have to be the director? If so, here’s my first “film” (it’s the pilot episode of my award-winning webseries), but I not only directed, but wrote, produced, acted, lit, D.P.ed, camera operated, edited, etc.:

    I have an HD one on but they broke my link at the time of this writing. Thanks guys, appreciate any feedback!

  • Maybe he can be a Director and not act in his movies. I feel that hurts rather than helps. He seems to have a beginers nack at Directing, I wish him luck, cuz he’s not an actor like his Friend Matt, even his brother does much better job at the craft.

  • I have seen worse from and done worse as a first time director. And It look like it was shot on VHS, so watching it now when everything is shot in HD…. Anyway as the saying goes, cream rises to the top!